215 posts tagged “moi”

We are doing the One Month to Live Challenge at our church.  The basic premise is to ask yourself at the start of each day, "What if I only had one month to live?"

Every day.  For 30 days.

I have done this once so far - today.

Let me tell you: it is already changing my thinking. 

I've already sent out one apology note and made one phone call just to say hello to someone I love.

This will be an interesting month, my friends.

So, I will admit. I have had a chance to read anyone's blogs in 2-3 weeks.

:-(

That said, if there's a post you feel I just have to see, please send me the link.

I miss you guys!  Glad many of you are on FB.

Per Hannah's request, here's my "third photo":

05 Grand Turk close up

I had to change the title a bit because the bullet point I ended my last post with was too long.  So, to refresh your memory:

Bullet Point #2: Change-agents are always seen as the enemy by those who prefer "but we've always done it that-a-way!"

(Note - excuse the continued italics - Vox is being lame tonight and won't let me convert the text back.  Gah!)

As most of you know, Rob was asked to come back to our church here to replace the departing Business Manager, bringing his corporate experience to help implement systems and processes as the church moves toward some big changes, such as a third service and multi-site ministry.  As many of you have also probably seen and learned, change of any kind, is often met with great resistance.  I knew that and had seen it before.

What I hadn't realized is that sometimes it is met with downright hostility.

Rob is a high capacity leader.  And not to toot my own horn, but I pretty much am one too.  High capacity at least.  And I like structure and processes, so helping Rob and executive pastoral team implement such has been great fun.  With one caveat.

Not everyone feels the same way as I do.  And that's caused a lot of stress over the past year.  For both of us.

And while I still have some things to learn about being a better listener and being careful how I say things, I've also learned that this is just part of the package.  The resistance I see and feel is not only normal, it's pretty typical and predictable.

Knowing that is half the battle.

~     ~     ~     ~     ~

Bullet Point #3: God gives us just what we need at just the right time.

Each day when I open up my 'lil Macbook, I see the Vox tab, open along with iGoogle, Facebook, and several others, and I think, "I should write a bit today."

But coffee, and walking, and working, and schlepping together dinner, and then finally falling into bed...then doing it all over again - and again! - seems to spirit my time away.

It probably hasn't helped that I am doing a lot more writing at work.  I love that, as it taps into the creative side of me that was largely unused when the majority of my day was full-up with mindless data-entry and "How may I help you?" phone calls.  I am a firm believer that this blogging thing shouldn't be a have-to.  So, I've stepped back a bit, and I am okay with that.

Have I missed it?  Yes.  And no.  I miss the rolling chronology of thoughts and events that routine blogging brings.  But giving myself license to not write as I've given myself license to write has been good, and very good.

This morning I awoke thinking about some things I've learned - or perhaps re-learned - in the past few days and weeks.  Then all the stuff that accompanies a Saturday morning happened, coupled with a lunch date with out-of-town company, which then precipitated a lovely nap. 

And the blog was cast aside again. 

When I later realized that I was just mindlessly browsing some of the aforementioned sites, what surely resembled a thought bubble appeared above my head:

Why don't you write something in your blog, silly?

And so, here I am, with what has become a rather long and blathering introduction to some bullet point ah-ha moments.  I was going to share them all in this one post, but you know, then I might not come here for another month or two.

Not to mention that would be one freakin' long post.

So, without further adieu, here's the first:

Bullet point #1: Never underestimate the power of a grandma.

The out-of-town company I mentioned above is Rob's mom, in for just under a week to visit us.  Wait; who am I kidding?  She's here to visit the grandkids.

But that's okay.  She should be here to see the grandkids, and thus far the whole lot of them are having a glorious time as she spoils them (and us too - I haven't had to cook dinner for two days now).  Yesterday, she took The Daughter shopping.  Rob and I came home and just about tripped over two large trash bags full of the child's clothes.  Post-mortum of said shopping spree, MeeMee and The Daughter had sorted through her entire room.

I can't tell you how many times I've asked the child to go through the mounds of clothes she had in her room and toss or give away what she no longer wears.  To no avail.

The power of the grandma.

Ah, but Nicole, you said they went shopping.  Good catch.  They did, and they got some great deals on some new clothes - but no where near as many as will go to the thrift next week.  And the best part?

Well.  For months and months and months and nigh on forever, Rob and I have had a battle with this child over her jeans.  Yes, the typical why-can't-I-wear-these-spray-painted-on-blues-whose-zipper-won't-go-all-the-way-closed-anymore jeans. 

MeeMee comes to town, and The Daughter senses a possible ally.  She begins to model pair after pair.  "Don't they look nice?" she inquires, to which MeeMee wrinkles her nose and says, "No."  To pair after pair after pair.

Guess where the jeans are now?

The power of the grandma.

Next time:

Bullet Point #2: Change-agents are always seen as the enemy by those who prefer "but we've always done it that-a-way!". 

I had what is called VNUS closure today on my right leg, and of course, since it is me and my leg, one would certainly expect some sort of curve ball.

Or in this case, curved vein.

Generally, they insert a catheter through a very small incision or puncture by your knee and then close the bad vein with RF energy.  They numb the area with a bit of lidocaine first, but until the catheter is inserted, the vein itself can not be numbed.

Oh, joy.

Yes, you can feel this probing and prodding.  It doesn't really hurt (okay, maybe it does a little, but not in a want-to-punch-the-doctor-in-the-face way), but there is this odd sensation of something alien snaking it's way up your leg, just under your skin.

And when they do this no less than 5 times to try to get said catheter past the unexpected curve in her vein, yes, Nicole will indeed break out into a cold sweat and wish that the Valium they'd given her had relaxed her just a tad more. 

(Okay, a lot more.)

The doctor is a wily one, and that vein will not win, so he finally makes another insertion above the curve (up in my thigh) and zaps the vein in two phases.  Once the anesthesia is pumped into the veins, the rest of the procedure is a piece of cake.

Until it's time to put the compression hose on.  Think sliding one long, skinny rubber band all the way up your leg.  Dumb leg looks and feels like sausage in a casing tonight. 

This will be such fun for 6 weeks!  (Read: I get the joy of wearing a compression stocking on my right leg for 6 freakin' weeks.)  And I don't get to run for 6 weeks either, which I am not too happy about after I'd just gotten my weekly distance up to around 13 miles.

I know I am kind of griping right now, but the reality is that in the end, this will be a good thing.  My leg ached all day yesterday and during my entire run today.  It was not getting any better.  This will help.

And I can walk for exercise.  As much as I want.  That will mean I will need to take more time out of my day to do so, and I will need to be more careful with my eating (will probably use livestrong.com again), but I was moving toward too much snacking anyhow - this is the calibration I needed.

Perhaps I can even get Rob out there striding with me.  His good cholesterol is too low again, and exercise is a key factor in regulating that, but he doesn't enjoy running.

The discomfort and inconveniences of the next 6 weeks will be worth the long term results.  Which should help me be ready to do it all again in the fall! 

Things I am not diggin' one bit:

- Being tired by 9 PM each night (one of the liabilities of getting up early, I suppose).

- Mosquitoes

- Work computers that take 10 minutes to load new apps

Things I am diggin', and diggin' much:

- Getting my workouts in each morning, regardless of how little I like rising early - and seeing the benefits of doing so!

- Being able to sit on a deck in the cool evening, despite the skeeters (what's a bit of blood loss anyway, eh?)

- New work computers, especially when said computer is an iMac!

Okay, so I couldn't think of a creative way to title an entry that will likely be all over the place since I haven't written much about the happenings in the life of Nicole in a while.  Most of my recent brain power has been used gathering, sorting, revising, and composing policies and procedures for work.  Rip-roaring stuff, I know.  But the crazy part is, I actually don't mind doing that kind of stuff.  And I got to work from home for two days.  With Rob. 

Rinse and repeat one day next week as well.

What would likely make others feel as if someone was slowly pulling off their toe nails one by one actually energizes me.  But it also saps all my mental energy by the end of the day, which means I got nothin' to give here.

So, in an effort to at least be somewhat organized and coherent in this post, I will give each section a nice generic heading and attempt to hit the bullet points.

Work

As aforementioned, I've been working on a project with Rob, revising the Policy and Procedure Manual.  Perhaps that should be creating, as they have never actually had a church-wide P&P manual.  What they have had is a bunch of policies and memos in various places.  Our job has been to grab those, figure out what's missing and write those, then bring them all together in an organized fashion, create one succinct manual, and then a few "for public consumption" guides that will be accessible to the volunteers.

It is a lot of work, to be sure, but as it is work I enjoy, it made the two days spent on such fly by.  Tuesday we will have another go at it (yay to working at home again!), and hopefully at least have the employee handbook portion ready for the Lead and Executive Pastors to review.

There are also some upcoming organizational changes that I am not at liberty to discuss yet, but if things go as I hope, I am very excited.  The shifts should better utilize folks' strengths and giftedness, including yours truly.

Home

Rob finished his first grad school class last week (with an A!), and the next one doesn't start until mid-June, so the plan is to work on a few projects around the house during the lull.  We are having new windows put in on the addition, and we took the cover off the pool yesterday.  For the latter to be ready, we still need to add more water, shock, and vacuum it.  But the yay factor is that what water is still in it (had to lower it about a foot to put the cover on) is clear. 

I'd also like to get some of the painting projects done, such as finishing the study and our bedroom.  We added a pet door out to the garage a few weeks ago, which allowed us to move the cat boxes to said area (woohoo!), but we still need to finish organizing the space (we've given up on the idea of actually using it as a garage since it is quite narrow) and moving the bins from the screen porch into the garage and/or shed.  My wish at that point is a glider or chairs or a pair of rockers for the screen porch, but so far the spousal unit has simply rolled his eyes at me.

And then there is a project that is quite daunting to me because it is so not in my skill set: landscaping.

When the previous owners were getting the house ready for sale, they were also prepping it for rent - whatever came to pass first, they were going to run with.  This totally worked in our favor, allowing us to rent for a month while our house in DE sold.  The downside was that they prepped the house for long-term tenants - meaning not only did they paint every wall with semi-gloss (gross!), they also stripped the yard of anything that might be high maintenance - or any type of maintenance - save mowing, weed wacking, and edging.

We had a company come out and quote re-vamping the yard with lovely shrubs and perrenials, but I about fainted when I saw the cost. 

By the same token, Rob, nor I, have ever planted a shrub.  Nor have we ever really had an interest in doing such.

But I also hate the nakedness of our front yard.

This could provide some interesting blogging fodder in the weeks and months to come.

Kiddos

The school year is winding down to the final weeks, praise God!  I am quite frankly tired of nagging motivating the children to stay on top of their assignments.  The Daughter continues to struggle with her honors English class; however, we did see improvement last marking period and the teacher is working closely with her now, so if we can get her through it with a C, I will be quite pleased.

She took her SATs the first weekend of this month - not sure how long it takes to get those back.  She chose the four colleges to send them to - two local, one in western VA, and one in DE.  Her plan at this point is to take one of the two years of cosmetology training via the tech school (free!) next year, since she only has to take 4 academic classes to graduate.  This will also allow her to explore her interest in cosmetology at no cost - then if she does like it, she can pay for the second year of training.  Following that, she plans to use her cosmetology certification to help her through college - either business or pre-law.

The Middle has been doing quite well with his classes, so we allowed the reinstatement of xBox for one hour on school nights ("I've been getting all As and Bs for a while now, Mom!).  But alas, that was short lived, as his Science grade dropped to a C this week because he got a big fat goose egg on his homework ("I lost it...").

He continues to do quite well with his guitar playing - he picks up new songs quickly and easily.

The Youngest had his final strings concert of the year on Tuesday - I am amazed at how far these 5th graders have come this year.  He can't decide if he wants to stick with violin or switch to cello next year.  I am just happy he wants to continue with orchestra.

With some trepidation, I am not looking forward to next month when his best friend moves to TX.  These are the kinds of hurts that I wish we could shield our babies from!

The Cruise!

I am still spending an inordinant about of time reading cruise boards and reviews for our ship.  It officially moved to Baltimore a few weeks ago, and I have been eating up any and all info posted about the move and subsequent cruises.  Overall they have been positive, save some embarkation and debarkation issues, which will hopefully be resolved by the time our vacation is here (just over 100 days from now!).

I think I have decided on what excursions we will do.  I am leaning toward just going with the flow in Grand Turk, since they have a nice beach and cruise center with shops, Margaritaville, and a pool.  I know we can safely take a taxi out to the lighthouse for some photo ops as well.  And since Rob and I plan to purchase our own snorkeling equipment, the teens can give it a whirl in calmer, shallower waters within our view in prep for a snorkeling excursion later that week.

Next stop is supposed to be a private island in the Bahamas, so another beach day, which is fine by me!  The boys may do a sting ray excursion, but The Daughter and I have no interest in that, so we will stay behind and work on our tans.

In Nassau, I am hoping to book a snorkeling excursion with Stuart's Cove (if they would ever email me back!).  They have good reviews and go to 2-3 different sites.  And it's only a half day, which would allow us time to have lunch on the ship and then still go into town and shop a bit if we want.

Our final stop, Freeport, doesn't get a lot of positive reviews since you basically dock in an industrial area, so I plan to book a dolphin encounter.  We are all really excited about this excursion - I hope it lives up to our expectations.

I think that about covers it....for now.  I am going to post this before I accidentally delete it; I can always go back and fix the typos later, eh?

Our church held a women's brunch today and the theme was "WWW - Wide World of Women".  Each of the pastor's wives was asked to speak for approximately five minutes on "their world" and stepping out and doing something for someone else.  The following is what I shared.

My World

I am a wife and a mother.  I am an administrative assistant.  Those who know me well might characterize me as a Type A first-born, and I would have to agree.  That's not always a "bad" thing though - I like organization and order, which goes hand in hand with my spiritual gifts of teaching and administration.

Order and structure make me happy, however, this can also lend it's self to my penchant for being too task-oriented and therefore guilty of tunnel vision when it comes to those who step into my world.  I just don't always take the time to really see those around me.

Years ago during Rob's last long deployment, we packed up our apartment, and I moved back in with my folks so we could pay off some debt, save some money, and, most importantly so that I could be present for my first nephew's birth.  During that time I enrolled in school full-time and worked part time.  I kept a very detailed list of everything I had to do each day, complete with time table.  Family and friends started teasing me...“If it’s not on Nicole’s schedule, it won't happen….You better make an appointment…" So on and so forth.

I took their good-natured teasing in stride.  Truth be told, I like my world.  I like bringing structure and having and accomplishing goals.  But sometimes it’s important to step out of that world, even if it means doing something that might not come naturally to me.

Out of My World

Last night as I was jotting down what I wanted to share, I came across The Night Prayer, attributed to St. Augustine:

Watch, O Lord, with those who wake or weep tonight, and give your angels and saints charge over those who slumber.
Tend your sick ones, O Lord Christ,
Rest your weary ones,
Bless your dying ones,
Soothe your suffering ones,
Pity your afflicted ones,
Shield your joyous ones,
And all for your love's sake. Amen.

I find his entreaty, “Shield Your joyous ones”, striking.  It is as if Augustine recognized that joy can be fragile and fleeting.

With that in mind, I want to encourage you to join me and step out of your world and do something that I know I need to do more often!

I am going to step out of my world and celebrate with someone.

Romans 12:15a (NIV) says, “Rejoice with those who rejoice”.  That sounds easy, but how many times has someone come to me or called me, or even emailed me with good news, and rather than pausing to celebrate with them, I am too busy trying to get through my to-do list?  Or worse, I immediately launch into what is going on in my own life (whether celebrate-worthy or not)!

The Amplified Version expounds on this thought even more by adding “[sharing others' joy]”.

If I am too busy, too task-driven, too goal-oriented, I might miss an opportunity to party with someone!

So, will you join me?  Will you pledge with me today to take some joy breaks?  To stop and celebrate with others when they have happy news?  To try and be a glass-half-full, ready-to-dance person?

Let the party begin!

What's your worst habit?

Being late.  And I hate it.

But somehow I always seem to lose 10 minutes...